Winnipeg Free Press

Winnipeg Free Press (Newspaper) - January 15, 1990, Winnipeg, Manitoba Winnipeg free press january 199o Page 14 Chuck features editor Spitz swims to soothe ego floating ego Mark Spitz Hast Given up his dream of earning a spot on the swim team for the 1992 olympics 20 years after his seven Gold medal performance in if i had it in me i should have it in me the its the an ego god gave me a body that adapts to aquatic sports Why not make one final Effort add symphony director Mstislav Rostropovich won his lawsuit in a Paris court after complaining one of his concert recordings had been mixed with the sound of urination and love making in the soundtrack of an obscure new polish Nan i guess id describe Roger me As a dark a Cross Between grapes of Wrath and pee Wees big filmmaker Michael Moore says of his Doc comedy about Laid off autoworkers and the chairman of general which is winning acclaim in Canadas Industrial Nan the release of Pooch Spring line of lounge and sports Wear for dogs has won uncritical Praise from people with nothing bet Ter to for 1990 and i predict the dressing of pets As a tremendous fashion says fashion forecaster Bernie non still trying to live Down his boy Hood of treacle pop stardom with a Tough and Nasty Donny Osmond poses the questions that have stymied philosophers for sons do people you have to be mean to Wear jeans and not shave is it bad to be Nice non assault with a deadly to wit a Cowboy is one of the criminal charges Laid against Chris Tian the male Lead in last years teen angst movie for kicking a cop while fleeing after crashing his car into a Telephone Odd the hol problem award goes to Rock guitarist Eddie Van non movie critic Roger Ebert predicts the end is near for bully Eddie whose last project was the film Harlem i think that in the movie and in general Murphy has a very Low opinion of and theres a certain mean spirited Ness in this at this Point in his he can do anything he and that what Hes doing thing he sooner or later the Bubble will non folksinger and former squatter Michelle shocked says now that the cold War is Over the United states should hand Over its military budget to the new York Tor spends up to a year to keep a family of three in a welfare but squatters have argued All along that for they could pro vide the Bare essentials for an abandoned compiled by Greg Pindera super swimmer Spitz in his element at Munich the far by Gary Larson vehicles registered of my Bernyel youre wearing my Nylon by Manfred Jager if vehicles with altered suspensions Are against the then Why Are they registered in the first place officials at the Highway departments Driver and vehicle licensing division have no Way of telling whether the suspension of the truck or car a person registers has in fact been raised to an illegal the most immediate Way to catch Drivers in vehicles whose cabs ride too High above the wheels is for police to pull them police say this does happen and owners of altered suspension vehicles Are regularly charged with breaking the another remedy is to exert control through the provincial vehicle inspection the program includes Only eight per cent of the vehicles when Drivers must either restore their vehicles to Legal limits or there off the is there a Central publication to Tell me what movies will be released on video cassette in the near future answers the major distributors know whats coming up weeks or months in they then Tell the video stores they Supply movies the stores Post upcoming titles together with titles just released and now available to your Best bet is to talk to your video store particularly if you have a specific title in most movies come out on cassette within months of theatre even Box office hits such As like take what does the expression going to the flicks mean its the Way the British used to let each other know they were taking in a the expression has fallen into disuse in recent if you want answers Call 9422047 exploding Birds pose new threat i have Good news and bad the Good news is that International communism now As a threat to our National somewhere below All Over Eastern oppressed Peoples such As the the the the the huns and the Marians have been holding huge protests to demand leaders who own decent for years a lot of communist leaders have dressed As though they made their own suits by stapling Road kills together on the Way to and the oppressed Peoples finally just got sick of also they want West Ern style with elections and campaigns and bal loons and to commercials starring convicted rapist Willie frown face of course not everybody thinks this is Vic president for real Dan Quayle definitely has his frown face because he thinks it could be another soviet so the Danster has taken time off from his Busy schedule of planning the big Mars Mission to go around reminding everybody that we need to remain vigilant in Case god forbid armed conflict should break out and we Are forced to join the Indiana nation Al guard unit of our but most observers agree with Henry in a recent new York times oped argued that the fetid Waters of marxist doctrine appear to have been permanently flushed away by the Tyd Bol automated commode freshener of it is hard to argue with this or even look directly at it without Eye pro this is Why Many people Are wondering since the inter National communist menace is currently about As organized As a food fight at a school for the visually Why dont we just get rid of this humongous defence thereby reap ing enormous such As that we would be from the threat of having to Check the spelling of Appart dead Roach sounds Doest it a glowing future a brighter to Morrow Well i hate to be the one who Points out the dead Roach in your Frozen but if you really think things Are improve then a a youre a because at the very time when the communist menace As former in ambassador Jeanne Kirkpatrick put it recently moments before passing shrinking faster than a swollen Dave Barry nasal membrane in a dristan another menace is looming on the a menace so horrible and potentially devas Tating that our Only Hope for stopping it May be to give me a Large Cash journalism i refer of course to the worsening world wide exploding organism epidemic As you know if you watch the Macneil Lehrer in re cent months i have presented documentary evidence of a series of violent unexpected explosions involving the following wide Range of organisms found in Al most every Home human municipal toilets and i had hoped that it would but now an Alert Reader named William Molloy of Canada motto a has sent me an extremely alarming article from the lawyers weekly stating that we now face an epidemic of exploding wedding the article describes a re cent wedding in a town called which is located in Hun where some 50 crows gorged themselves on Rice thrown at a pair of some of the crows then apparently soiling the wedding guests clothing with their Avian the article also quotes a zoologist in not making any of this up named Lazlo or Ganslaw As stating that wedding guests should not throw Rice be cause it expands rapidly inside which not Only is a threat to but the Birds explode so their flying body parts can be dangerous to this is Well Worth bearing in especially if youre a Young engaged couple planning a big formal How would you feel if the last thing you As you drove away from your recep Tion on that very special was Uncle Ralph hurling his body protectively onto aunt Louise As the air was filled with bursts of potentially lethal Finch Shrap Nel youd feel because you had nine glasses of but in the morning youd feel in not feeling so Good tic Miami Himl i news hour def wheel of Fortune g o3tjd sky news hour feud d How to jump Street g eb3pufe on Earth Street Sta Tion Maiden nation g gig movie unspeakable acts 120 Fofi Larry King live prize ii to tonight Idon Estudes in the scrip Ture Cynd first news ols night court to Tow hockey news to edition business report Sta Snew wilderness r by Nouvelle Europe Ennes ej3s Home and away country aft entre Chen at four g Vaaj jeopardy g affair q its a dogs Ufa Oft Eli entertain ment tonight e3tjsci genes in herbs Idun koreans in Manitoba Htwe Ster Ejof final hockey Chicago at 03 crossfire 03 34 Detroit Black journal Crim sword of survival the yellow submarine 120 Duck la Highway secs capital report g so Dynastie Bay g family Teddy z g 0 some consumer advice idiots be Temps Dune Palm us Pueblo Qadi wic Fook and Chase is doctor who father Eho business world g of wonder years g Doo movie Blue Bayou 120 to Izaias Murphy Brown Ometz cancer treatment and research draw part 2 of 2 air Sleivis the Echo will never die r both Alyssa eb31ytv rocks 9 Eba performance part 1 of 2 Esget tyls country 38lor do Temps g High g ek4i0 anything but love g alg designing women join Trade watch eds darts and entertain ment 9 famous Teddy z orb blood is Strong coi Jake and the Fatman Oss Newhart g it artist series c7dpay to highlights Ejof Iid be Tele Roumal g cwt Csc 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Enn Banco 1 Cenat ional g Tjode attenders sport Loi de la g Montreal 1025h3i3dcb journal Rock n Roll just say no room g Highway r est capital report r g i news Flis Cinema Benvenuta 150 be Nouvelle Canad Ennes r d 812 sky news hour a Hall Videon showcase Japan David Letterman r movie Angels with dirty faces 120 id latino am Eric an o Venc Eremos Oche cheers Omi sew Mitt new world Oswalds pick 8 Elvis the Echo the first show of an All Elvis night on the Nashville net this tribute is followed by Elvis the fans and then Elvis heart and orc Fol ascended masters is threes company passport desk ook never tha Twain q 3s at the improve tos dems heart soul untold stories r be actual be is circus Trueman r country g Ggles Nouvelle Tva g Nouvelle do of Carson r Noih night court ass night court Mim Prairie pulse news Biff to be announced first news bs5 Hawaii five0 g Jas Powerboat show r ois sports tonight Etc Fla portrait of the Earth r eds bbl playhouse ee3s spirit connection r Siles Nouvelle do sport Auto Stop girl 120 1 Europe Ennes Raju 24 hours late night help me lose weight world of Ani Mals Bess bless father world r g 1 1 40oau Newhart r g movie want you 130 odones arsenic Hall current affair cd Filton wrestling Showbiz today r r j Steve Anthony Elias Home and away scheduled feuds Between Hollywood celebrities o health and wellness connection update stage be 3ft bread Esai your Worl Dantema tonal report r g de Sel r 1 ooh jmj news r Ometz ebb who movie Daisy Miller 1 20 min Dunig Howatch eem thais incredible a is the Ute r 1 r Temps r 1soee radio France nil hockey r Jiw news overnight Martin 02 30 at the improve r dec in Bonanza Point g Nouvelle Tva r America g o 4 love boat in mi1 movie show boat 150 Omlar raking overnight news hour Urta miss Marker 20 on the prize ii part 1 of 8 g to St Peter Wimsey the nine tailors r r less Smith and Smith Eli Albishop Fulton Sheen later with Bob Costas inside edition news to eur taxi eff sports lat night a aboriginal inquiry highlights 01 killing joke Mckines pick 8 Prog skid dead men dont Wear plaid movie buffs will get a kick out of this detective spoof that sees Steve Martin interacting with movie greats from the including the three Welcome to 120 ebb Mcvie the yellow submarine 120 Begh Canadian hour r Montreal r Nouvelle do sport nature scene o fantasy Island 34ad lib r Japan Sci guns of will son Nett crossfire 03s6 profiles of nature report r q lose or draw Ritj Jinn news business world r As Arnold it Willie francs ;