Winnipeg Free Press

Winnipeg Free Press (Newspaper) - May 28, 2000, Winnipeg, Manitoba Editor Elizabeth 6977234 Winnipeg free May 2000 Magazine b3 family answer drug question honestly what do you say to your child when not if she did you Ever use drugs Ive already told the truth yes and have Wor ried about doing so Ever Vanessa knows my take on recreational drug use dont make a mistake about drugs the Way Mommy i was going on need less to i was very relieved recently to learn that i did the right according to organizers of the National youth Antidrug Media a project of the National drug control some parents who used drugs in the past choose to lie about but they risk losing their credibility if their children discover the say Campaign organizers on their web site Many experts recommend that when a child asks this the response should be instead of shying away from these kinds of seize the Opportunity to speak frankly about drugs or alcohol or for that matter and let your child know just where you stand on the they youll also open up a two Way conversation that should be resumed while theres no perfect Way to get the message its Proba Bly Campaign advisers Sug to avoid providing More information than your child Actu ally ask clarifying questions to make sure you understand exactly Why and what a child is asking before answering questions about your past drug and limit your response to that they this includes speaking frankly about what attracted you to drugs in the first Why drugs Are what you know now that you didst know then and Why you want your kids to avoid Mak ing the same i was 16 going on 17 when i got caught smoking my fathers response does this mean youre going to get pregnant and drop out of now my Mother How could you be so stupid desperately wanting to prove to my parents that i want on the fast track to i got some new friends and kept my nose to the Grindstone at but 30 years i can still feel the Humilia fear and id do any thing to spare my daughter that every child is at risk for drugs and parents play a huge role in whether or not their child abuses monitoring your Childs activities and praising and rewarding her for Good behaviour is a Good Start but generally being More involved in your Childs life is be absolutely Clear with your kids that you dont want them doing and talk often about the dangers of drug and alcohol listen to your kids when they ask questions and encourage them to express paraphrase what Treyve said and repeat it Back to them so they feel confident that youre really hearing make time every Day to catch up with your child and open the lines of All it takes is a few minutes while youre cleaning up after dinner or right before get to know your Childs friends and their parents and dont hesitate to ask where your child is who Shes going to be with and what be try to be there after the danger zone for drug according to is Between 4 and 6 if you work out Side the Home and cant arrange flex make sure theres some adult just an older your preteens and Young teens after and eat meals together As often As you its a great time to for everyone to share the events of their to rein Force messages and to stud ies show that kids whose families eat together at least five times a week Are less Likely to be involved in drugs or Kristin Jenkins is editor chief of an internet company that markets health information Over the worldwide no Parent wants their Childs slumber party to be a but some precautions have to be taken especially if they Are coed its the eats that can make or break these lumber parties two words that strike fear into hearts of parents need not be nuclear events by Darryl Owens if you Survey the English Lan you will unearth a handful of phrases that reduce parents to quivering phrases like Assembly or College or weve got right two words that inspire similar loss of equilibrium Are slumber slumber Par endorsing ties become a slumber popular around age seven or Pany they demonstrates Stoke Auto no Tenet in my and pro Wujen vide the youngsters a allows him or her to forge experts friendships endorsing a slumber party demonstrates Trust in the allows him or her to forge friendships and instill Confidence to explore the world beyond his or her for slumber parties Are As essential As Sweet 16 a 1998 conducted by All about you found that 96 per cent of girls younger than 18 had dodged a Pillow or two at a slumber it is a says Wendy president of an online part planning of retaining ones sanity after hosting a if you can hold on to a Little bit in the youve although called slumber no Parent even at risk of his or her sanity wants his or her Childs party to be a Lucki these Basic strategies can ensure that a Childs slumber party is roaring not while Sav ing mom and dad from his and her devise a party once you have agreed to let your House Dou ble As a on night nuclear testing the first thing to do is limit the number of guests first of and provide the Structure of what there going to says Sarah a program specialist for Early childhood education for Orange Public according to the All about you 84 per cent of girls invite four or More friends to every slumber it helps to limit the invitations to Good friends who rarely quarrel and scout out sleep ing space to guarantee guests will enjoy Elbow room once they do decide the time has come to slum a Well planned party begins and ends at a specific says Penny author of the Best party Book 1001 creative ideas for fun panics Meadowbrook and Doest run too Long or firm beginning and ending times not Only ensure that stragglers will not upset any scheduled but most dictates to their parents exactly when they Are expected to fetch their bundles of develop a hip party themes provide the Hook on which to hang everything from activities to Warner depending on the age of your popular to shows or movies such As Sabrina the teenage Witch or Stuart Little can serve As asking guests to sport clothes to match the slumber party such As Warmup suits for a sports theme or Roc band helps jump Start the or just ask guests to Don their Best plan scores of a perfect slumber party offers Active games and activities that neutralize your revellers Adrena line the secret games such As musical chairs slumber or scavenger party Success Hunts kindle the in party fire for is Young have when it is time 00 Hluch to Cool inn Send them to a Neutral Corner too Many with some arts Nomac and crafts that will not leave a and hot too Keepsake of Many kids glue or paint on your prizes go with party winners and losers should All come away with some with older try inter Active activities such As party games such As charades or buy a Karaoke com pact disc and let them Wail the blues into a soup a movie suitable for the age of your guests works nicely when it is time to chill Stock up on More than engaging the thing that makes or Breaks a slumber party is the they come looking to Moyle not Only must you have for each guest three times their weight in your spread should be Rich in variety and Appeal to palates that consider a Well dressed Foo Long the height of haute forget the lobster bisque and serve ice soda and those Heap ing helpings of those aforementioned to ease your parental pangs of Warner suggests throwing in a healthful such As Carrot or celery raisins and Apple set ground once the guests arrive and before they shift into party Mode child development experts suggest that parents outline their Tell your guests what is Tell them what you will not Toler if you have set a advise your if you do not want guests on the Telephone Mak ing Calls to Tell them set consequences for two warnings for Telephone for might warrant a Call to the Childs remember the secret to slumber party Success is simple have too much too Many and not too Many Moyle just dig in and hold Cav Alry comes in the Orlando Sentinel coed sleepovers depend on individuals by Parry i Owens it was the usual gab swapped Between Mary something heavy on her hastily corralled her sister Mary was invited the following evening to a Sleepover after the High school basketball she was excited to she told there was a not All the guests were Mary and Lucy of Are characters on the we networks popular 7th in one the family drama Drew attention to coed slumber experts say these boy girl Gett Gethers have become increasingly prevalent and guests have grown increasingly As one might there exists a great difference of opinion regarding the Wisdom of hosting coed some parents Call it harmless some Sanction the parties As a Way to impose benign orwellian supervision on the social lives of their kids to keep them not running the others say that in an age when sexual messages bombard children and increasingly younger kids Are experimenting with coed sleepovers Are an invitation to w whether coed sleepovers Are prudent depends on the individuals and the kids and on the says eve Lyn a child development expert and syndicated i would not suggest that it be done with kids above the sixth Grade and then Only with lots of ifs taken care some experts warn that when the fire of hormones is placed so near the fuse of there is potential for explosive Conse kids say they can have sex any but Why would you put them together on the floor of your House says Teresa author of parenting without pres sure Nav press publishing its easy for even the Best of kids to make poor for Petersen hosted a coed Sleepover on her daughters she would consult each Childs parents not Only to elicit their approval and outline her plans but also to examine their Val she took care to ensure the children were longtime friends who were that she would be Able to supervise the Chil Dren the entire that activities were and that separate same sex sleeping areas were we loved it and it says who addresses family issues at her web site but i have a feeling we were sort of a rare outside of such rarefied Compa Langston says coed sleepovers seem a legitimate option Only after a prom or other special parents might wish to restrict children to the Home turf rather than allow ing Young hearts to run free on such a sexually charged should you assume that Langston suggests strict guidelines i limit the number of i require each guest to bring a sleeping i keep the lights on All i restrict guests from leaving once inside to ensure no one leaves and returns with most she parents must stay what you dont want to do is seclude kids in the Back bedroom and say Langston the Orlando Sentinel j l ;