Winnipeg Free Press

Winnipeg Free Press (Newspaper) - July 28, 2013, Winnipeg, Manitoba C M Y K PAGE A15 MISS LONELYHEARTS MAUREEN SCURFIELD lovecoach@ hotmail. com WIRED DAVID BELL db@ thedavidbell. com TheDavidBell. com David Bell (@ thedavidbell) is a young entrepreneur in Winnipeg. He specializes in emerging technology and online aspects of business, including web and social media consulting. Access his company online at iBXMediaGroup. ca. He is an active member of the YouTube community ( http:// www. TheDavidBell. com), with more than two million views and 5,000 subscribers. He was also a Dragons' Den contestant. Email: db@ thedavidbell. com. Theatre Les Mis�rables Centennial Concert Hall, 2 and 7: 30 p. m.; start at $ 45 at www. ticketmaster. ca or 1- 855- 985- 5000. Winnipeg Fringe Festival Annual theatre fest, various venues, www. winnipegfringe. com, 204- 956- 1340. Best of Friends Reunion Celebrations Dinner Theatre, Canad Inns Fort Garry, 1824 Pembina Hwy., to Aug. 10, 6: 15 p. m.; $ 30.95 to $ 69.95 at 204- 982- 8282. Out & About Monarch Butterfly Festival Noon to 4 p. m., Living Prairie Museum, crafts, storytelling, guided hikes. Summer Music Series At the Lyric Theatre, Assiniboine Park, 7 p. m., Steve Oliver. Jazz in the Leo Mol Sculpture Garden Assiniboine Park, 3 p. m., Rosemarie Todaschuk. Royal Canadian Numismatic Association: Canadian Money Collectors Winnipeg Convention Centre, 10 a. m. to 5 p. m. Gimli Film Festival Gimli, full festival schedule at www. gimlifilm. com. Nightclubs The Cavern ( 112 Osborne St., downstairs): The Dustbusters Tavern United MTS Centre ( 260 Hargrave St.): Jeff Adams Tavern United Transcona ( 826 Regent Ave.): Dave Stelter Times Change( d) High & Lonesome Club ( Main St. & St. Mary Ave.): Jam hosted by Big Dave McLean Windsor Hotel ( 187 Garry St.): Greg Mac- Pherson DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My mother says I have a " fat ass" like hers. She keeps telling me ways to disguise it and points to her own big butt as a way to excuse her critical comments. It's like she wants us to belong to a Mother and Daughter Big Butt Club, and she thinks it's cute. I hate it! In fact, I've developed a big problem over it. I won't go to the beach and go swimming unless I think I will be the only one there. I don't ever wear jeans or pants, just skirts and tops to cover it. The other night, my friends dragged me out to a downtown club and this guy, who kept buying me drinks and asking me to dance, finally said, " You have a great booty, just like J- Lo's." Rrrright. I am not a dummy. I am in second year university. I thought he was nuts and told him so, and then he went away like I had kicked him. Weird! Is he some kind of pervert who just wants a woman because of her strange behind? - Can't Win For Losing, River Heights Dear Can't Win: You can't win for thinking you're a loser and that your attractiveness as a person is defined by your buttocks. You don't hear Michelle Obama, or anybody who sees that attractive woman, commenting about her curvy hips. It's time to face off with your mother on this topic. You heard me. She needs to hear straight from your lips that all this talk about your behind and hers is over for good. You've had your quota for life. Suggest she get some therapy over her fixation and quietly get some counselling over this problem yourself through your university services so it doesn't follow you through life. You don't realize this yet, but the way you treated that young man on the dance floor was abominable and unnecessary. He wasn't a pervert; he was attracted to you just the way you are. Dear Miss Lonelyhearts : A few months ago, I found out my husband of 15 years had been cheating on me. He then left me for this woman across town. She left her husband, too. He and I made contact and found out we were quite brutally deceived by a mountain of lies. We began speaking daily, as we both have young children and are very concerned for them. I should tell you neither of us was happy in our marriages but stayed for the children ( he has two and I have three). Now that we're separated we both have our own homes and shared custody. Soon after we began talking, this man and I started a romantic relationship. It is wonderful - he's kind, sweet, attractive and we're very similar. The relationship has become quite serious, but we're keeping it secret, so as not to confuse our poor children more than they already are. My exhusband would also go crazy as he is very jealous. He continues to harass me non- stop, even though he's moved in with this other woman. Most of my family and friends have been supportive of my new relationship, but not all of them. Do you think this is a healthy relationship so soon after a 15- year marriage, or are we crazy? - Finally Loving Life, Charleswood Dear Finally: Looking for a little revenge? Well then, don't make the kids pay. It may not be too soon for YOU and this guy to match up, but it's way too soon for your children. Some of them may already know. What kind of secret is it when everybody knows but your ex? At least stop deceiving yourself. You didn't need to start talking with this guy every single day about your kids, and you've already been telling friends and family, who could potentially tell your ex. This situation will upset your jealous ex- husband far more if he is the last to know, but there will be some satisfaction in that for you. Look, you wanted out anyway, so be discreet for a time if it's not too late and see if it actually works out past your revenge stage. If so, it'd be best to get this thing out in a whole family- counselling situation where a trained professional can help with everybody's explosive, mixed- up feelings. And your new man, should do the same on his side with his ex and his kids. Please send questions or comments c/ o lovecoach@ hotmail. com or mail letters to Miss Lonelyhearts c/ o Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, R2X 3B6 THE LINEUP ENTERTAINMENT A15 SUNDAY, JULY 28, 2013 Tell your mother to butt out Back to iPhone I have a problem. I switch phones way too much. In the past six months, I've gone from iPhone 4 to Samsung Galaxy S3 to Blackberry Bold 9900 to BlackBerry Z10, and now back to iPhone. I've done a complete 360. I enjoyed the Z10 for a while, but I was having one recurring issue: The phone kept randomly turning on and off. I would be in the middle of a phone call and the phone would just shut down. Rogers told me it would have to send my phone away for a month to fix the issue, and I would probably have to use a Sony Xperia for a few weeks, which wouldn't be cool. Then I got in touch with BlackBerry via Twitter direct message and it was no help whatsoever. When I set up my iPhone yesterday and wiped my Z10 so I could sell it, I realized it was a software issue and all I needed to do was restore my phone and that reoccurring issue would've ceased. Nonetheless, after using an iPhone for a day, I have finally realized this is the phone to have. Since I've used every big phone on the market today, I'm comfortable saying the iPhone is by far the best phone. Just the way everything works - the apps that are available, iMessage... If I had to rank the phones I've used in the past six months, it would look like this: iPhone, BlackBerry Bold 9900 ( don't ask me why), Samsung Galaxy S3, then BlackBerry Z10. Who knows how much longer I'll be on the iPhone before I decide to switch again, but for now, I am so damn happy I'm back on iPhone. Insane Google autocompletes EVER type something into Google and some absolutely random autocomplete search appears? Yeah, me too. Google populates its autocomplete search results based on the number of times something has been searched for. I've stumbled across some random and funny suggested searches I'd like to share with you. It's pretty insane to see that people would even be searching for this kind of stuff. 1. Search: the meaning of life is / Autocomplete: 42 2. Search: what is the only / Autocomplete: animal with four knees 3. Search: how many / Autocomplete: calories in a banana 4. Search: marriage is / Autocomplete: a private affair 5. Search: how can / Autocomplete: she slap 6. Search: where did / Autocomplete: you sleep last night 7. Search: are there / Autocomplete: snakes in Hawaii 8. Search: where is / Autocomplete: Chuck Norris 9. Search: where will / Autocomplete: James Gandolfini be buried Samsung edges Apple SAMSUNG mobile products are becoming incredibly popular. Backtrack a year, and you wouldn't even have had to think twice what the most- sold phone would be: iPhone. Recently, Samsung surpassed Apple as the most profitable phone seller. In the second quarter of 2013, Samsung recorded $ 5.2 billion in sales while Apple recorded $ 4.6 billion. The reason Samsung has edged Apple is because of the flexibility it has on pricing and better shipment volumes from China. " Samsung is performing well in the U. S. market, while Huawei, ZTE and other local brands are growing vigorously in China," Strategy Analytics executive director Neil Mawston said. " Apple is now under intense pressure to launch more iPhone models at cheaper price points or with larger screens to fend off the surging competition and recapture lost profits in the second half of 2013." It's been rumoured Apple is slated to release an iPhone at a cheaper price point. I'd be curious to see what Apple would include in a less expensive iPhone. Instagram ads WHEN Facebook bought Instagram a while back for $ 1 billion, it was expected that Facebook was going to start implementing advertising in the Instagram feed. At the end of the day, it's a business that needs to make money. Most likely companies are going to have accounts that are promoted and their images will appear in your feed. From an advertising perspective, it's absolutely incredible. You can dodge Facebook ads, but on Instagram, if a photo is in your feed, you have to look at it. I have a question for you: If Instagram implements ads, will you start using it less or will you just accept it and continue on as usual? Tweet me @ thedavidbell. A_ 15_ Jul- 28- 13_ FP_ 01. indd A15 7/ 27/ 13 10: 08: 10 PM ;