Winnipeg Free Press

Winnipeg Free Press (Newspaper) - December 28, 2020, Winnipeg, Manitoba C M Y K PAGE B1 CITY?BUSINESS ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR: STACEY THIDRICKSON 204-697-7292 ? CITY.DESK@FREEPRESS.MB.CA ? WINNIPEGFREEPRESS.COM B1 MONDAY DECEMBER 28, 2020 SECTION BCONNECT WITH WINNIPEG'S NO. 1 NEWS SOURCE? T HE new year starts in a few days, and with that comes change and a clean slate. Or at least that's what it feels like - a new beginning and a chance at a fresh start. I don't know how many New Year's resolutions I've made throughout my life, but most of them have been about losing weight. I'm not alone in that, a quick Google search shows that losing weight is one of the top New Year's resolutions for everyone. Like most people, I failed at achieving this year- over-year. Probably because for me it was always more of a wish than an action. Nonetheless, I stopped making resolutions a few years ago and my life is better for it. I have always struggled with my weight and as a result I have also always struggled with my self worth. I started my first diet in elementary school and since then I have walked a fine line of disordered eating and unbalanced behaviours that aren't healthy, and that frankly made me feel terrible both inside and out. Every diet I've ever started, I have failed. Diet culture is a scam, and it's robbing us of joy and happiness. Don't get me wrong, I'm not slag- ging healthy lifestyles and people who watch what they eat. I think we should all strive to be healthy. I am not going after people who are living by diets and diet plans for whatever reason, that is none of my business. I am just saying that diet culture is toxic and it teaches us that there is something wrong with our bodies because they are bigger or because they don't look a certain way. There is a lot of shame and stigma attached to diet culture and beauty standards that are impossible to obtain. It's a damn shame that so many of us put so much stock into that, because all of us are more than just a body. It's only been in the last couple of years that I have really learned to start appreciating myself and my body for what they are. I have stretch marks, cellulite, fat and wobbly skin in places that society has deemed unattractive. My thighs are thick, and when I gain weight it's prominent everywhere, especially in my face. Being in my own skin used to really bug me, because I was never happy with the way I looked. I felt trapped in a fat vessel. I applauded and marvelled at larger people who posed for photos and existed in real life without trying to shroud themselves or hide their size. Being called fat was a weakness to me. It was a weapon and I would crumble at those words. I spoke up for and advocated for fat acceptance and Health at Every Size (HAES), but in my own mind I was the exception. The fat exception that always needed to lose 10 pounds. In hindsight, I was not the advocate I thought I was or needed to be. I am working on that. Then I had my daughter. That was the big awakening for me, when she was born and I saw and experienced what my body was capable of, and what it gave life to. I realized pretty quickly that my body and my being were worthy of respect and that I have some pretty deep-rooted self esteem and body image issues that I don't want to pass on to her. So, I made it my goal to stop hating myself and to appreciate every inch of me. I stopped comparing myself to other people, other images, and filtered photos on Instagram. It's made my life easier and a whole lot happier. I stopped cutting myself down and I stopped calling myself fat. Even if I am fat, I don't like to be called fat, so I stopped doing it. Then I made a point to take notice of the things I like about myself, and day after day the list got bigger, because there is a lot to ap- preciate when you take time and pause to notice it. What a difference this has made in my life. I wish I had gained this perspective a long time ago. But, I'm grateful to have learned it at all. This year, if you find yourself look- ing to make a New Year's resolution, consider adding a little bit of self love and acceptance into your list. It'll change your life, I promise. shelka79@hotmail.com @ShelleyACook Sprinkle some self love on your New Year's resolutions SHELLEY COOK WITH so many people lost to COVID-19, death is on the minds of many Win- nipeggers. That makes the Lights for Lives program at Charleswood United Church all the more meaningful this year. The program, which was started in 1993 by two couples in the church who experienced the deaths of children, is a way for people to remember loved ones who have died. Starting in December, the church accepts names of people who are to be remembered. Starting at first Ad- vent, mini-lights are woven into green garland encircling the sanctuary, with each light glowing in memory of a loved one who has died. The names are recorded in a Book of Remembrance, and a memorial card is presented indicating a light is shining at Charleswood United Church in mem- ory of their loved one. The program ends on the first Sunday in January closest to Epiphany with a non-denominational memorial service featuring songs, scripture and reflec- tion. "Lights for Lives is open to anyone," said Charleswood's minister, Michael Wilson, noting the church has received as many as 500 names some years. "The names have always been col- lected before and after services in De- cember, so they have tended towards our community. But it was never in- tended to be exclusive. Anyone can of- fer a name." This year, due to the pandemic, the usual in-person service will not be held. Instead, Wilson will record a service that will be made available on Jan. 10. In previous years, the church ac- cepted donations from those submit- ting names, giving the funds to grief support groups and hospice programs in the province. For practical reasons, Wilson said, "we are not accepting do- nations this year." For Wilson, "the heart of the pro- gram is that we should not be alone in our grief. That is true all the time and becomes especially true as the holidays approach. It is an extension of the min- istry of compassion we endeavor to of- fer throughout the year." Jackie Drever has been a member of Charleswood since 1970. She remem- bers her husband and daughter through Lights for Lives, both of whom died in the last three years. "There is a beauty in remembering loved ones this way," she said, adding that not being able to attend the closing service this year "reminds me how pre- cious it is." The lights are "also a reminder that we are loved, supported and cared for by the church," she said. Maureen Spier, a participant in the program for 20 years, remembers her parents, a sibling, relatives and friends. "I love the lights," she said. "It's so comforting to sit in the sanctuary and think of loved ones." People who would like to submit a name to Lights for Lives can do so by Dec. 31 by contacting the church at office@charleswoodunited.org or 204- 832-3667. faith@freepress.mb.ca Lights for Lives beacon of hope, remembrance JOHN LONGHURST A NOTE, to show they care.Three Grade 12 students at Vin-cent Massey Collegiate - assist- ed by classmates, and students at �cole Viscount Alexander and �cole Julie- Riel - are delivering cards and letters to personal care homes throughout the city, in an effort to help residents feel less lonely during the COVID-19 pan- demic. Katie Skwarchuk, Maggy McGun- igal and Tegwen Bryan, all 17, started planning and contacting care homes for their project, "Note of Kindness," in September. "We were looking for COVID-safe ways to help out in our community, and when we came up with this, we thought it was the perfect project for us be- cause we all really like the art, we like to write, so we can incorporate art into our cards and into our letters," Tegwen said. The trio's families have supported the project by driving them to personal care homes to deliver the letters. "We thought this would be a really great way to spread kindness and boost spirits, because it's also delivering let- ters in a very COVID-safe way, there isn't a lot of interaction involved," Maggy said. The teens said it's rewarding to brighten the day of residents at care homes who don't get to see family and friends every day. "As teenagers, it's hard for us and we have the opportunity to go to school every day and see our friends and the people that are in our cohort. So, we can hardly imagine the situation care homes are in and it's nice to see how many people are eager to help out," Katie said. So far, the teenagers have delivered more than 250 cards and letters. They plan to continue writing and delivering during the break and into the new year. (If members of the public want to get involved or care homes want to receive letters, contact them at anoteofkind- ness03@gmail.com.) Dozens of schools have been work- ing on similar projects to deliver mes- sages to care home residents, including Lord Selkirk and Hastings. A teacher at Greenway had her students create gifts for front-line health-care workers. One specific project has a school from every division involved, said Stacey Abramson, a teacher at Maples Collegi- ate and founder of "Love Grows." Abramson said she felt helpless watching COVID-19 cases and deaths rise at the Maples care home in early November, and wanted to do something, via art, to help. "Love Grows" allows students to cre- ate art and write a note on the back of the postcard to be delivered to residents and health-care workers at care homes. The second part of the project allows the resident to write a wish they have on a maple leaf attached to the postcard. Grant Park High School got involved with "Love Grows" within the first week Abramson started the project. "It was right around the time when cases in care homes were just getting out of control. At home, my wife and I were feeling pretty heavy about that, not knowing what to do and I was think- ing about ways to approach it in a class- room and everything I thought of felt forced, or not the right thing. Then I saw that, and I thought it was perfect," said Jonathan Dueck, Grant Park art teacher. He's already delivered nearly 300 student-made postcards to Poseidon care home. "I would love it for this to be an on- going thing. People need art all year- round, not just at Christmas time," he said. "Even after the pandemic, I think it would be neat. "I've always been interested in mak- ing connections outside of the class- room for students - and this may be one of those things that could grow into something else where we work with residents on different projects." kellen.taniguchi@freepress.mb.ca Tidings of comfort and joy KELLEN TANIGUCHI Students deliver notes of kindness to seniors SUPPLIED Katie Skwarchuk (from left) Maggy McGunigal and Tegwen Bryan, Grade 12 students at Vincent Massey Collegiate, are delivering cards and letters to personal care home residents. B_01_Dec-28-20_FP_01.indd B1 12/27/20 8:30 PM ;